Innovative artist and activist Chuck SJ has been a big favourite at Get In Her Ears for some time now, having played live for us on more than one occasion, including most recently supporting Irish queer punks Strange New Places at The Rossi Bar in Brighton last year. Continuing their development as an artist and organiser, they introduced the BYENARY record label earlier this year: “A place for all those assigned flawed and miscreants at birth to find and create music that they can see themselves in. We support trans and queer artists to access and thrive in the music scene, focusing on analog physical music and community events.” And now, following empowering pop-punk anthem ‘Ur Not My Mum’ a couple of months ago, they’ve shared a stirring new single ahead of the release of their upcoming album next Spring.
To mark the release of ‘Lovesick Puppy‘, Chuck has written a few words for us; reflecting on what inspired the writing of the song, what it means to transition, the complex nature of grief, and their epic journey to write and record their album while travelling the UK’s canals with their trusty companion, Archer. Read below, watch the beautiful new video for ‘Lovesick Puppy‘ and sign up to Chuck’s mailing list now!
How fitting that I’ve been asked to talk about ‘Lovesick Puppy’ during a period of time where my past keeps chasing me. In another lifetime the planets would be my hyperfixation, but as it is, astrology has always been homework that sits on the bottom of my to do list. Fortunately, my world is so queer I breathe it in like second-hand smoke – I’m paying enough attention to know I feel more unsettled than usual, and that’s likely due to us all being in a ‘transition period’
What does it mean to be trans in transition? When does transition become complete… ? When the final box is unpacked? When the last tear is shed? When we’ve buried our last friend?
When I wrote ‘Lovesick Puppy’, I did so with itchy feet and a yearning to find whatever comes next. Enough time has passed now that the things, the people, the homes that I’ve found since have been and gone. The pursuit continues, and I have no idea what I’m looking for.
The song is the first from an album that I set out to write from my narrowboat whilst doing a 225 mile journey across the UK’s rivers and canals, just me and my dog Archer. What started off being about a need for solitude whilst simultaneously craving the queer community that city life brings, then transitioned itself into a conversation with the internet where I plead for answers around my mental health in a state of facism. In the end, it became a realisation that austerity has destroyed the way I grieve for my late mum.
I think my mum was the most awesome woman to have ever existed. She was funny, she was intelligent and she held a room in a way that I now know is no easy feat. So, to admit that a part of me doubts that she’d have loved who I turned out to be feels like an insult to her memory; a suspicion I should keep to myself. The reality is, it’s not her fault I hold these doubts, and it isn’t mine either. I have spent the past ten years living in a country where transphobia has dominated our headlines: despite the buffet of forever changing prime ministers that we’ve feasted upon, despite Brexit, despite the global pandemic, despite the rising cases in poverty, transphobia has never stopped trending. What if mum got swept up in that? I feel guilty for grieving my mum because I worry I’m too queer for her to have loved me if she were still here.
What a heavy realisation to have in the middle of nowhere on a boat without a person around, and how obscure to think I may have never made this discovery had I not set out to write this album. A brutal reminder of why I write music; it’’s how I figure out what I’m feeling.
I suppose that is what it is to transition. To move through these states of awareness with both confrontation and purpose, carrying the people we’ve lost along the way.
Huge thanks to Chuck for writing so beautifully about their new single and reflections. Their album is due for release in Spring ‘2027 under BYENARY records. Sign up to their mailing list to not miss it – this is particularly important with all the restrictions that are part of social media now, which mean that mailing lists are now an essential tool for musicians to reach people. Chuck’s also doing a Europeon tour from 25th November and would love to see some folk there. More details here. Help them cover the costs of touring by ordering some merch or a CD from their bandcamp now!
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